Hipster

If your mustache is disproportionately longer than the hair on your head, you are a hipster.

Oh look here's the seed it grew from

Lisa: Oh look, here's the seed it grew from
Me: What?
Lisa: A pumpkin plant always grows from a seed
Me: You totally made that up
Lisa: Well I am your wife

Good luck?

Wearing a bib inside out is good luck

Diet Dr. Pepper

Diet Dr. Pepper tastes so good because it was actually invented before "Regular" Dr. Pepper in 1893. Regular Dr. Pepper was first produced in 1908 when a local corn syrup producer offered Dr. James Pepper corn syrup as a less expensive alternative to aspartame.

In a pinch...

Bubble bath makes a great body wash.